We are not perfect and nor would I want us to be

 

Artwork: Letters To Loved Photo: Hannah Horne

 

Photo: Hannah Horne

The following letter was written by Hannah Horne for her sons Dexter and Theo. You can follow her on Instagram @midwifehorne

 

 

 

 

 

Dear Dexter and Theo,

My gorgeous, precious boys I have often thought of writing you letters then life happens and it just falls by the wayside. Recently I was asked if I would like to write you a letter for a lovely lady who collates letters written from parents to their children helping them to document a legacy of love. I am so pleased that I was because otherwise I would not be writing this, it would have been something I would continue to think about but never quite get round to. It is such a cliché but time really does fly once you have children and I am not really sure where the last 7 years have gone. I am sure this will seem odd to you now but I am also sure that you will understand this all one day when you are grown and realise the increasing speed of the passage of time. These years have been a rollercoaster of emotions for me and Daddy from brilliantly wonderful to moments full of anxiety or frustration. They have not always been easy because being a parent is not easy; but they have always, always been filled with love.

Dexter you are our kind, thoughtful, cuddly bundle of gorgeousness who is so capable of doing anything you set your mind to achieve. Such a sensitive soul who feels everything so strongly both for yourself and others. This can challenge you as you sometimes struggle to cope with your emotions but it also is your strength in that it makes you the caring soul that you are, always ready with a smile, cuddle or a kind gesture. You never fail to amaze me with your imagination, knowledge of facts and stubborn will, and although that can be a challenge for me and Daddy when we need you to understand certain things, it gives you a tenacity which I am sure will serve you well and help you to achieve all you wish for.

Theo you are our wacky yet wonderful, second born bundle of fun. You are unfazed by life and all that it throws at you, taking everything in your stride it is as if life comes easy to you. Laid back and lovely you see the fun in every moment, and you never fail to make us laugh but our challenge here is to make you understand when the joke needs to stop! Your willing nature and ability to learn things by default when we are teaching your brother always amazes me. Your ‘cool as cucumber’ attitude will help you take what life throws at you and make it great.

I am a very proud Mummy of two precious boys, for this I am eternally grateful. I am also incredibly grateful for your Daddy. He is a wonderful Daddy to you and since the moment you were born he has been there to look after us all. As I said before being a parent is not easy; this is not because we don’t love you enough, it is because we love you so much. The weight of the responsibility to get everything right and be the very best parents we can be to you is no easy task. To be your Mummy is really the most wonderful thing but it is also relentless and tiring, and there is no time off. When you were babies and Mummy was tired Daddy stepped in. He tended to everything I needed to feed you, then changed nappies, rocked you and ‘shush-ed’ you. As you have grown he has played with you, taught you anything you have wished to know and helped me in the very important task of not only keeping you alive but shaping you in to the wonderful beings that you are. You are very lucky boys that your Daddy is equally capable of looking after you as I am, and often I think he is a better Dad than I am a Mum. He doesn’t worry about the house or the mess, he just plays with you with a wonderful imagination, he watches films and pauses them every few minutes to make sure you understand what is happening when I can barely stay awake, and he teaches you with a patience I will never have. Then when he is done he will tidy up and do the cleaning knowing that this will make me happy. When I am tired and have answered to ‘Muuummmmmmeeeee’ for what feels like the millionth time that day and I can take no more he takes over and gives me the break that I need, so that I can come back refreshed and better able to be the Mummy you need me to be. When I am not there I need not worry about you because he sees to your every need and always has done. There has never been a moment where you or I have needed him and he has not been there. He really is the best Daddy you could ever wish for.

To me our family is perfectly imperfect. We are not perfect and nor would I want us to be, that title has too much responsibility to bear and is too much to live up to. We are human, we get tired, we get emotional, and we sometimes shout but to me our family is as perfect as I would want it to be, because above all we love each other with all our hearts. Every day in our home I see little acts of love; when Daddy makes my coffee in the morning and gets your breakfast; when you both kiss and hug me just before running through the school gate; when Dexter helps Theo open packets; when Theo, more often than not, will compromise to continue playing Dexter’s game; when we get excited that Daddy is finally home from work; when we snuggle down for story time together; when I cook Daddy’s tea and ask him about his day. This is what love and family is all about; the small things. Just being together, caring for each other and being on the same team. It’s our joke for me to call out “Team work makes…..” and you chant “the dreamwork!” whilst Daddy rolls his eyes and we laugh, it might be tongue in cheek but for me it rings true. I am proud of you, of your Daddy and of our little team. Together you have made all my dreams come true.

All my love, forever and always,

Mummy.

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2 Comments

  1. Emily
    August 15, 2017 / 8:50 am

    What a beautiful heartfelt honest letter that will now last forever!!! Beautiful writing as always x

  2. September 7, 2017 / 11:09 pm

    Thank you Emily xx

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